Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
