I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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