I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
