How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Randomize
