Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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