You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
