we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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