Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize