and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize