Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
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