I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
