Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
what day is it and did you see me today?
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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