you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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