wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize
