dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Randomize
