If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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