I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
