the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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