the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Randomize
