I'm going to jail i love you
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
