i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
