I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Randomize
