Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
