It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
