its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
