my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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