Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Randomize
