Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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