You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
