She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
