new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize