I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
