id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Randomize
