I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
