He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
