I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
