wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Houston, we have a blender
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
