Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Randomize
