But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
