Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
