We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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