So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Boobs are out for the taking
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Randomize