Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
