Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
