Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Randomize
