I wish I only lived at night.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
