come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
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