ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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