That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Randomize