it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
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